secret lovers…

October 13, 2009

I’m heading out of town tomorrow to spend a few days with my lover.  we are heading to door county, WI.  it looks fabulous.  it will be away from here and that in and of it self is fabulous.  we plan to hike around the beautiful state parks and see amazing sunsets out across lake michigan.  we are staying on a golf course on washington island thursday night.  it should be fun.  I love to drive the cart and brian loves to play so it works well for everyone.  ; )

the kids will be fine.  they will be in very capable hands with other very capable hands available if need be.  it takes a whole team of people to get us out of town.  aids for this time and that time and therapy while we are gone to help the aids get a break.  dinner plans and timelines.  medicine inventory and potty information.

being so excited to be away from the kids makes me feel a little hypocritical.  here I am always talking about how much I want my baby and yet here I am so excited to be away from my kids.  which is it?  well….  it is both.  just because luke isn’t here doesn’t mean that I need a break from the 3 that are with me and just because I need a break doesn’t mean that I don’t want luke.  I know all that, but trying to remember it wears me out.

I hope to spend the time focused on what I do have, on this wonderful lover of mine who looks after me so well.  let everything else just fall away and live very much in the present moment.  that’s my goal.  I’ll let you know how it turns out.

Place me like a seal over your heart,

like a seal on your arm;

for love is as strong as death,

its jealousy unyielding as the grave.

It burns like a blazing fire,

like a mighty flame.

song of songs … 8:6


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