not my best friend…

May 24, 2010

as we were finishing up our study of john, we talked a bit about nicodemus.  it seems like most people know him as the one who would only come seeking Jesus under the cover of night.  they question his love and where his loyalties lied in the very end.  I don’t know…  I think there is a lot more here, a lot more to the story.  if I insert myself into the story, and of course I do, it goes more like this.

I love the nicodemus in my life.  the one who came to me in darkest night nights of my life.  the one who was there to wash the wounds and apply the healing balm when the rest of my closest flock was scattered.  this dear person is not my best friend.  know that I saw that very carefully and with no intention of hurting either party.  my beloved (and I have a few… a few) mean more to me than I can explain, but I think that in the moment, in that  moment, I think that the pain and anguish and death of my child was too much for my very closest friends to look upon. … … … like when the disciples were scattered as Jesus was crucified. 

not one of my best friends ever got to hold him.   I was always troubled by that.  I am not anymore.    my nicodemus was there to hold luke and look me in the eyes and say, ” I know”.   I can now see that different friends fill different roles.  it takes all kinds to carry us through this world.

like I said before, I love my dear, beloved few friends.  they receive the majority of my time and energy.  gladly.  but just for tonight, I want to thank my nicodemus.  what would I have done without you?

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