this is going to hurt me just as much…

September 8, 2010

(sigh)

so, I didn’t actually say it, but I was thinking it.  we’re having to do some disciplining that I’d rather not do.  without disclosing too much information, let ‘s just say that my fine young man has some struggles like every other fine young man out there.  it’s so hard …   I just want to ignore it.  or even throw a fit about it and then just move on. … … … BUT… … … it’s time to let him know we are serious.  the issue is serious.  we aren’t messing around.  he’ll be sitting out of the highschool football game where the younger players all make the tunnel for the big guys to run through.  he cried when we told him.

and now…

I feel bad.  I want to cry.  I don’t want to make him sit out.  I don’t want to hold him accountable.  I don’t want to be the parents, the tough parents.  this is actually hurting me!  I want to take him to the game, give him $20 bucks and say go have some fun.  I want to just dismiss his behavior as childish, immature.  I don’t want to ‘expect more’ from him.   (sigh… sigh… sigh)  this is so hard.

and yet… I know… I have been given charge over this boy.  I am the one that must steer him in such way that when he is grown he will be a blessing and not a burden. …  dear Lord… help me.

Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the Lord.  Psalm 31:24

Train a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not turn from it.  Proverbs 22:6

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2 Responses to “this is going to hurt me just as much…”

  1. Megan said

    You’re doing the right thing. Really. And I know it’s hard. We had to hold Katie out of the first field trip of her summer camp this summer because she had some behavioral issues at home in the day or so leading up to it. We needed to show her that we were serious, that if she acts like that, there are consequences. And I came to work in tears that day, with both my manager and my department director patting me on the back, telling me I was doing the right thing (they are older and more experienced than I).

    But it worked out, and Katie learned from the experience, and acted more appropriately the rest of the summer so that she was able to go on all the field trips. It was hard on everyone at the time, but it was the right decision, and I think we all learned from it.

    Stay strong, stick with your decision. You’re a good mom. 🙂

  2. Sara said

    Oh Jenifer – I am so sorry. I know the pain just on small scale things here so far. It is SO much easier on me to not discipline, to not cause them short term pain. BUT short term pain is better than long term pain and as you know withholding the discipline is not Biblical. I will be upholding you guys in prayer during this time!

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